Things We Dare Not Do Discussion Guide

In the small Mexican coastal village of El Roblito, 16-year-old Ñoño lives what seems to be an idyllic existence with his loving family. But he holds a secret. Defying gender norms, Ñoño works up the courage to tell his family he wants to live his life as a woman, a fraught decision in a country shrouded in machismo and transphobia.

This guide is an invitation to dialogue. It is based on a belief in the power of human connection and designed for people who want to use Things We Dare Not Do to engage family, friends, classmates, colleagues, and communities. In contrast to initiatives that foster debates in which participants try to convince others that they are right, this document envisions conversations undertaken in a spirit of openness in which people try to understand one another and expand their thinking by sharing viewpoints and listening actively.

The discussion prompts are intentionally crafted to help a wide range of audiences think more deeply about the issues in the film. Rather than attempting to address them all, choose one or two that best meet your needs and interests. And be sure to leave time to consider taking action. Planning next steps can help people leave the room feeling energized and optimistic, even in instances when conversations have been difficult.

Jade Sanchez-Ventura is a writer and radical educator. She works in memoir and her personal essays have been published across an array of online literary journals, and in print with Slice Magazine and Seal Press. Her work has been featured on Bitch Media’s Popaganda podcast and been awarded the Slice Literary Conference “Bridging the Gap” award; a Disquiet Literary conference fellowship; and a Hertog fellowship. She is a regular contributor to MUTHA Magazine, which champions a fiery re-imagining of parenting. As an educator, she is very good at being continually wowed by her students and their words on the page. She believes a commitment to racial equity and social justice is essential to the practice of teaching. She has spent the last decade studying and implementing this pedagogical approach to education with the Brooklyn Free School, an urban democratic free school in New York City. Though she has ties to many countries, she has always made her home in Brooklyn, New York. She’s on Instagram posting about radical parenting, teaching, race, writing, and other such matters; find her @jade_m_sv.